Partner Article

What’s your business approach?

Politeness and the values of fair play are considered key elements of what makes Britain great. Our view of politeness is associated with not acting in a selfish or over-domineering style. While people who are pushy are perceived as being rude and arrogant.

So what does this mean for UK business leaders? Often there is a tendency to act in a way that is too passive or “soft” for fear of upsetting anyone. People are regularly promoted for their ability to be polite and nice, but this can become a trap. It means when an individual finds themselves in a more senior position having to manage others, they can often struggle to make difficult decisions or feel inhibited and guilty about giving orders. At worst they can fail to challenge others on unacceptable behaviours which negatively effects the business.

Research by online expenses management provider webexpenses reveals that two-thirds of UK managers have difficulty being assertive even though more than three-quarters believe that excessive politeness impacts their business. Everyday issues that managers typically avoid tackling out of politeness includes: poor time-keeping and unjustified absence from work; theft or fraudulent expense claims; bad behaviour; and poor performance. Whilst not life-threatening for most businesses, repeated avoidance of such issues can lead to an escalating problem which can cost businesses money and time.

We’ve seen the impact that workers politely staying quiet can have. The collapse of Lehman Brothers in 2008, is widely considered the catalyst of the financial crisis and was in part due to people internally not wanting to speak out against risky business behaviours. Such behaviour was allowed to go unchecked and ultimately resulted in whole banks collapsing, sending economic shockwaves around the world.

Being assertive isn’t an open invitation for leaders to become mini-dictators. Going too far and acting in a way that is aggressive or rude, can be equally counter-productive. The relationship between assertiveness and performance follows an inverted-U. As assertiveness increases so does perceived success, but there is a peak point, more assertive people are perceived as less likeable and this can lead colleagues to be less cooperative creating more conflict.

The optimum middle point will fall in different places depending on your culture. In Britain, we have a stronger preference to be consulted, and to explore different options. That doesn’t mean UK leaders should always dampen down their assertiveness in every situation. The challenge for UK managers is finding when it’s right to challenge others and when it’s best to give way.

Under time pressure, a leader may need to give quick straightforward orders and be “bossy”. However, on another day, in order to empower and motivate the team they might collectively brainstorm a new solution. Most situations, call for a combination of both: being clear and firm whilst being polite.

A difficulty in getting the right balance of “politeness” or “pushiness” is that we each have our own personalities. Whatever our natural default style, we all need to learn how to flex assertive behaviours in the right way and at the right time to find that optimum middle ground.

For business leaders and managers looking to flex more assertive behaviours, I recommend:

• Quick: act before a problem escalates or it becomes embedded and let others see you dealing with problems regularly and immediately.
• Clear: ensure your expectations are unambiguous. As leader it is your responsibility to communicate the company’s goals and values.
• Consistent: have shared rules and apply them to all. This avoids conflict and dissatisfaction in the team.
• Continued: if the problem persists then restate the message. People may not readily change. Don’t use this as an excuse to give up.
• Consequences: celebrate success but also be prepared to take action if others cannot or will not do what is required for the business.

But be sure to balance the above with a polite human touch:

• Calm: manage your own emotions to avoid expressing unhelpful anger and blame. You may need to wait until initial frustrations subside.
• Considerate: ask questions to understand others’ feelings and point of view so that they feel valued.
• Compromise: accommodate the needs of others where this does not undermine your goal, to develop trust and loyalty.
• Collaborate: ask the other person to propose a solution to empower them and share ownership of the problem.
• Care: offer tools/training to show that however tough your demands, you’re on the same side and will provide support.

Achieving the right mix of pushiness and politeness can be difficult, but once mastered, can reap huge benefits.

This was posted in Bdaily's Members' News section by Timo Schmidt .